Dreams...

So I've been thinking about goals a lot lately. I had a conversation with my dad the other day about what I was going to do when I got out of college. I've thought about this topic a little, but I haven't sat down and thought out everything I plan to do after I graduate. I had the idea that I would just take a year off and earn some money so that I could actually afford to go to college, and potentially pick a major because right now I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life. It's quite scary honestly. I'm graduating in one year from this institution. I love Asbury, but I can't stay here forever, eventually I have to move on to real life. But real life scares me. I have to get a real job, I have to take control of my whole life, when I don't know what my life is for or what to do. I guess that's the way everyone feels, but I'm feeling this especially right now. I mean, I know I want to work in missions, but I don't know in what respect that is. I'm waiting on God, and I guess it's just a little frustrating, not to mention nerve-wracking, that he hardly ever shows up early, but only on time. I guess I need to learn that his time and mine are different, his being perfect.

But I digress to things of less ultimate importance to my life. I've decided to run for freshmen class sponsor for the new freshmen class next year. This position is unique to Asbury, and I would get to (along with a female sponsor) name the new class, serve as their governing body until they elect their own, give them their class colors, and class verse. It's a huge responsibility, but it's one I've dreamed of doing since I was a freshman here at Asbury. I mean, it's even a little more special to me now since my brother, Richard, will be in that class next year (at least as of right now he will be). I've prayed a lot about it, and while I'm still not 100 percent sure it's what God has for me, I figure I'll give it a shot. If I don't get it, it wasn't meant to be. I guess that's how I run a lot of my life, just go for it and what was meant to be will be. That may not be the best means of living one's life, but it's worked pretty well for me so far.

Returning to major life issues, I'm going to Ukraine this summer. I am psyched out of my mind that I get to go to Europe again for another summer. I will be going through the World Gospel Mission (WGM) as a volunteer in action (VIA). I'm most likely going to be working with youth and orphans as my internship, which I am so excited about. Ever since I was on SMT last summer, I have come to realize that I really love to work with youth. It's just an exciting premise. I love Eastern Europe, and think that might be where God is leading me to serve as a missionary. Maybe this trip will let me have a little more clarity on that. It seems in my life, that God hardly ever gives clarity before it is needed, and I assume this will be the same. Please pray for me as I work on this endeavour that is so important to me. I hope to really learn a lot on this trip. Visiting other places is great, and it's one of my favorite things to do in life, but learning how to be different from the world, to serve and be selfless, that's what it's really about. I want so much to help people through the work I do in my life, and while I may make it a little too glorious in my head, I can't imagine a better way to live one's life. I just have so far to go in my walk with Christ, that I hope he's able to use me in whatever way he sees fit this summer. It's usually different than what I imagine, so I won't be surprised if the summer is a total surprise. But I guess that's what dreams are. You think about them, but no matter what they always turn out different than you thought they would. Maybe that's for the best.

Peru 2008